A Button for Government Workers

28 05 2008

blame it on the killer eggs

15 12 2007

Diner Diner burning bright
sober beacon
drunken night.

Java Java steaming hot
swore I wouldn’t
drink a lot.

Eggs Eggs slimy soft
all too soon
I send aloft.

Run Run for the door
retch my innards
to the floor.

Wake Wake tormented head
sweating gin
wish I were dead.


with apologies to William Blake


3 12 2007

last year
at no particular time
I watched tv

Extreme! Cooking Magazine

16 11 2007

An Al-Qaeda Thanksgiving

Downhill Hors d’Oeuvres

Chainsaw Salad

I Lost Fifty Pounds Eating Explosives!

A Cavalcade of Anxiety – a participatory poem (add a stanza or two)

20 09 2007


colony collapse
restless legs
identity theft
tainted eggs

leaded Barbie
cancer genes
home invasion
tainted greens

Clifford’s poop – a participatory poem (add a stanza)

14 09 2007


Clifford’s poop is big and red.
I wish I had a cat instead.

Clifford is a big red dog
I wish he did a smaller log

Clifford’s poop is freshly laid
I think I’ll need a bigger spade.

Truck load in – truck load out.
People do drive by and shout

obscenities from A to Z
so on their cars he takes a pee.

The pee is long, the pee is red
The big red dog may soon be dead

Clifford goes to see the vet
He pees again the vet gets wet

Clifford’s back begins to hump
It’s time for him to take a dump!

So, be careful not to stand to close.
You might just find it’s really gross.

And if you’ve found you stood too near,
It may be too late by the time you’d hear.

There’s not a soul that would think you cool,
all covered in Clifford’s big red stool.

That Thing in My Closet

12 09 2007


That thing in my closet,
it’s not always there.

But when it is –
it gives me a scare