Bush’s Halloween costume – help him decide:

President Bush dressed as
“the voice in my ear”.

Don’t be evil – step aside…

It stares at me while I sleep

I finally caught it looking at me. I had pretended to be  sleeping and hid the camera under my pillow. When I felt its presence I flashed this picture before the thing disappeared.

( A true bedtime story brought to you by the makers of Ambien CR )

A Cavalcade of Anxiety – a participatory poem (add a stanza or two)

colony collapse
restless legs
identity theft
tainted eggs

leaded Barbie
cancer genes
home invasion
tainted greens

Clifford’s poop – a participatory poem (add a stanza)

Clifford’s poop is big and red.
I wish I had a cat instead.

Clifford is a big red dog
I wish he did a smaller log

Clifford’s poop is freshly laid
I think I’ll need a bigger spade.

Truck load in – truck load out.
People do drive by and shout

obscenities from A to Z
so on their cars he takes a pee.

The pee is long, the pee is red
The big red dog may soon be dead

Clifford goes to see the vet
He pees again the vet gets wet

Clifford’s back begins to hump
It’s time for him to take a dump!

So, be careful not to stand to close.
You might just find it’s really gross.

And if you’ve found you stood too near,
It may be too late by the time you’d hear.

There’s not a soul that would think you cool,
all covered in Clifford’s big red stool.

That Thing in My Closet

That thing in my closet,
it’s not always there.

But when it is –
it gives me a scare